I hate to do two sappy posts in a row, but this is where the Spirit led me this morning so please bear with me.
When I am done with my bible study in the morning I often listen to a couple of worship songs before I get in the shower and really start my work day. Lately I have been checking out the website of the local Christian station and it’s “just played” list to get some ideas and keep things fresh. This morning one of the songs on the list reminded me of someone who I love very much. As soon as I saw it on the playlist the Holy Spirit rushed over me and I knew I had to get some things out.
Thought I only knew her for a little while she had a huge impact on my life. Though she was a fairly petite woman she was a spiritual giant. When I was around her I ALLWAYS felt loved. Not with just any love, the love of God. It radiated from her. It was a love that came with an overwhelming peace. I hope this does not hurt the feelings of anyone who reads this (family and close friends) but there is only one other I have ever felt this love from. My heavenly father. I have wish that I could love others like this. I have wish that I could have felt it from others. I have tried to work desperately on relationships where I know that it was my and the other persons goal to love each other in this way (my marriage). Though at times it has come close I don’t believe we ever arrived.
To feel loved by someone in such an unconditional fashion was indescribable. Toward the end of her life she had needs that may have clouded this a bit. This is where I entered her life thought and I can tell you FIRST HAND that even in her condition of need she STILL gave more that she took. The best way that I can describe it is that when I was around her I FELT GOD.
Mom I love you so much! Please forgive me, I know it might be selfish, but I miss you. Mom I have a hard time understanding her sometimes. I have a hard time leading her. Even though I know all answers are in Him, I wish you were here to ask questions to. She is you in so many ways. Her heart is your heart. A heart completely after God. You made me feel so loved and excepted. When I was around you I felt like everything was going to be ok. I know that you are in heaven. I know you are dancing and singing for Him. I know that you have been greatly rewarded for the amazing race you ran here on Earth and are now resting in Him. I know that you are not sick. I know that you body is not frail and holding you back. I know that you are leaping and jumping and singing.
Mom, thank you for all that you have given me. I love you and I miss you so much. I can’t wait to see you again.
(((hugs)))
ReplyDeleteYes, she was amazing.
Hi...
ReplyDeleteI'm tiptoeing here, realize I'm on sacred ground.
She was God's gift to you, a gift that is yours to keep for all eternity.
God is keeping you close to His heart.
Shalom,
Lidj
Katie ~
ReplyDeleteLove you and (((hugs))) back. :)
Crown of Beauty~
Thank you so much. You tred light as an angel and are so right. Shalom back and much love. I was excited to see the way you signed off. Are you Jewish by chance? Thank you for visiting and commenting. :) Please come back often.
Giant Hugs. I to have felt as you do that she gave more then she took. Even in her last few days here she always asked what she could do for others instead of asking others to do for her. She was an angel like no other and no one that knew her could ever think otherwise. She had such a way with words she could help in any situation. We all miss her greatly but were so blessed to have known her at all.
ReplyDelete